Charming Hostess


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About Charming Hostess
bullet
Dali Tzerni
bulletLaws of Physics
bulletMi Nuera
bulletWon't you Keep Us
bulletGive Him a Little Time
bulletMi Dimandas
bulletFerret Said
bulletDilmano Dilbero
bulletOh Julie
bulletSha Shtil
bulletKelzsex
bulletElenke
bulletI'm Not Hungry
bulletWhen Jesus Christ Was

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Lyrics to Eat


1. Dali Tzerni

Aren't my eyes black enough for you? Isn't my face fair enough for you?
Your eyes are black, but you can keep them.
Your face is fair, but it's flat as a plate.
I don't want it. Keep it for yourself.

Words: Bulgarian.
Music:
Traditional Bulgarian song from Pirin-Macedonia.
Arrangement:
Jewlia Eisenberg & Charming Hostess

 


2. Laws of Physics

The pink half-moon on the third joint
of my slender finger--
My body fragments are full of bread.
That's why I fear holding bread is why I'm here.
I seem to have lost my hads around here.
And where my eyes were,
now only holes appear
(We're now only holes up here). Look at me up
here! Thank G-d for the laws of physics. Thank G-d for the law.
A skinny skinny boy complains. My body takes up too much room.
This makes me laugh.
I hold myself back. I hold myself back.
I could crush you with my weight, smash your little
body down, throw you through the window pane,
bloody lifeless on the ground. A skinny skinny boy is dead.

Words: Jewlia Eisenberg
Music:
Jewlia Eisenberg & Charming Hostess

3. Mi Nuera


I. "My beautiful daughter-in-law,
embroider the waists of our blouses.
Your peers have already done this,
and you're just lying there sleeping."
"I have no light, nore anyone to give it to me.
My mother-in-law is killing me with screams!"

II. Once there was a priest lying sick in bed.
In the middle of the night, he called to his maid:
"Bring me a pitcher, there's no water."
She went to the fountain and was bitten by a frog.
And in nine months she bore a tiny
child who lacked nothing, not even a cassock.

III. The bride bathes and
her suitors rejoice. What do brides deserve?
I'll tell you: white bred, a bed of roses, a beautiful chicken.
I'm telling you!

Words: Ladino (Judeo-Spanish)
Music:
3 Traditional Jewish wedding songs from Morocco
Arrangement:
Jewlia Eisenberg & Charming Hostess


4. Won't you Keep Us Working


G-d of the nightfall, G-d of the shade.
G-d of the deep
It's you who have made all of the evening,
all of the night, all of the motion without light.
Won't you keep us working, working,
working down below?

Words: The Resident's
Music:
The Resident's (Published by Pale Pachyderm BMI)
Arrangement:
Jewlia Eisenberg, Charming Hostess

 

 

5. Give Him a Little Time

"Did you really mean it?" "I don't say what I don't mean"
Then she turned her eyes away, she didn't want for him to see her.
Now he starts drinking. "Not again" is what she's thinking.
"Maybe I should leave and wait this coming storm out at my sister's".
Give him a little time. He'll take your time,
he'll take it all, he'll take your lifetime.
Just needs a little work.
He'll take your love, he'll take it all,
now he's your life's work.
Almost out the backdoor--"BITCH!
Where do you think you're going?"
Slaps her face so hard she's seeing stars.
The next blow sets her reeling.
She's pinned to the floor, legs spread,
eyes closed, thinking "Tomorrow will be different,
things are always different then..."
Blackened eye and swelled lip,
bruised thighs, bruised hip--
"Maybe I should leave him--" give him a little time
"Maybe now's the time to--" give him a little time

Words: Jewlia eisenberg
Music:
Traditional Hungarian song from Transylvania. Original text includes the line "Nothing could be a greater sorrow and misery than two people who live together without love."
Arrangement:
Jewlia Eisenberg and Charming Hostess

 

 

6. Mi Dimandas

My demands are few. I want a house with windows I can leave out of.
I want a bath in my house, and sandals, and my own bath attendant.

Words: Ladino (Judeo-Spanish)
Music:
Traditional Jewish women's song from Turkey
Arrangement:
Jewlia Eisenberg


 

7. Ferret Said

Ferret said sorry. Ferret said "I've had enough of your shit-eating grin." She walked out.
She was back the next day, saying "I'm sorry, honey. I'm sorry, so sorry. Please accept my apology."
Wynn said "Yeah I sleep with other girls, if you can't handle that too bad, cuz we had such a good thing."
He smiled bright. White bread white.
Wynn said "It's too bad that you can't handle that I sleep with other girls, if you can't handle that, I'm sorry. It's too bad. I sleep with other girls, and I'm sorry honey."
Smile, smile, smile, don't smile. Don't smile Ferret,
don't smile Ferret, smile.
I'm not sorry. I'm not sorry.
You can say your sorry til the wind eats up our homes
until the worms destroy our bones and still I'd rather be alone.
Ferret said sorry.

Words: Jewlia Eisenberg
Music:
Jewlia Eisenberg and Charming Hostess
Original bass line:
Stuart Popejoy

 

8. Dilmano Dilbero

A celebration of the growth and harvest of red peppers.

Words: Bulgarian
Music:
Traditional Bulgarian song which became the theme song to the Bulgarian equivalent of "The Beverly Hillbillies"
Vocal Arrangement:
Phillipe Koutev
ReArrangement:
Jewlia Eisenberg and Charming Hostess

 

 

9. Oh Julie

Oh Julie, oh Lord, gal. Early in the morning baby,
about half past four,
I came to your window, I knocked on your door.
you said
"Get away from my window,
stop knocking on my door.
I got another gal baby, I don't want you no more."
So I said
"Oh yeah Julie? Well, you done got ugly.
Hey now gal, rock that baby.
Uh-oh Julie, you better keep that gal inside.
Cuz when the clock strikes four, baby,
I'm gonna knock on your door."
Words & Music: Traditional African-American work song from Alabama
Arrangement:
Jewlia Eisenberg and Charming Hostess

 

 


10. Sha Shtil

Be quiet.
When a man can't dance,
he says the band can't play
Be quiet.

Words: Yiddish Proverb
Music:
Jewlia Eisenberg

 

 

11. Kelzsex

(My greenhorn cousin came to me, beautiful, with cheeks like red oranges, eyes like red oranges, eyes like heaven in the springtime, and feet that wanted to dance. As the years passed, she became a ruin. She gathered paychecks week by week until nothing was left of her.)
Today, when I meet my cousin and I ask her:
"How ya doing, greenhorn?"
She sighs, and I read from her expression:
Columbus's land should burn!"
Words: Hyman Prizant
Music:
Abe Schwartz and the Rebbe of Lebedik un Freylekh
Arrangement:
Jewlia Eisenberg & Charming Hostess

 

 

12. Elenke

Elenke, little Elenke,
beautiful Elenke MEETS
A little beautiful boy.
Oy.

Words: Bulgarian
Music:
Traditional Bulgarian song PLUS "Fun Tashlikh" by Abe Schwartz
Arrangement:
Jewlia Eisenberg and Charming Hostess


13. I'm Not Hungry


When I look into the mirror I see you.
There's a fat girl who spits and stares,
hides behind my chair,
she'll pull out your hair, she will. I'm not hungry,
no I'm not hungry, I have to kill that fat girl.
I'll break her neck, then I'll brush my teeth.
I'm not hungry, I have to kill that fat girl.
I'll throw her up, then I'll brush my teeth.
(This song is for)Those who dided on Cosmo's alter.
Words: Jewlia Eisenberg
Music:
Traditional Bulgarian song
Vocal Arrangement:
Phillipe Koutev
ReArrangement:
Jewlia Eisenberg and Charming Hostess

 

 

14. When Jesus Christ Was Here on Earth

When Jesus Christ was here on earth they said he was a spy.
He healed the sick and raised the dead. Go thou and prophesy.
When passing by a sinful crowd, I heard a woman say:
"If I could but his garment touch I'd never more to die."

Words & Music: Traditional white gospel song from Virginia
Arrangement:
Jewlia Eisenberg

 

 

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Copyright 2006 Charming Hostess

Last updated November 18, 2006

choho@charminghostess.us Charming Hostess